It’s Painful

I really do hope time-out is good for us. I skipped service to sleep the pain through (14 hours to be exact). I know it would be better to just go, ‘cos He will have the answer for me. But I did not have any motivation to leave my room, much less leave the house and travel.

Am I feeling better? Well, just say that I really should have gone for service this morning…

I can’t expect anybody to understand me, really. I should have already known after like what, 27 years? Nobody really do. That is the exact reason why I turned to Him in the first place right? Because I found out He is the one who does.
Yet I thought at last I found a person in my life who actually knows me more than anyone else. I mean, we have so much connection, that sometimes we don’t even need to talk to know what each other is thinking. We feel so at ease with each other, so happy together, I could tell him anything, he knows (or I assumed he knows) what I am thinking, how to console and comfort me… But guess I thought wrong. He tries. Yes, he tries really hard, but well, like uncle says he is just human. My expectations were to high and wrongly placed.

My heart is aching. So who else can I turn to now?